Not only do I struggle to get through the simplest of tasks when awake I have found myself having THE weirdest dreams over the past months.
My head is constantly elsewhere, whether I'm working, doing things around the house or I'm snuggled up in bed.
Apparently it's the increase in hormones that cause our dreams to go wild. Everything gets blamed on them doesn't it? *shakes fist at hormones*
Let me share some of my dream gems:
- Driving a rally car with Craig David - and no, we weren't making love by Wednesday
- Running away from a giant tidal wave of Iced Gems. WTF?
- Blowing up a condom to giant proportions and using it as some sort of phallic hot air balloon
- Having an indepth debate with a tree about the pros and cons of camouflage. Again, WTF?
- Having my baby just appear in my arms and my tummy returning to normal size in an instant - I blame The Sims for that one
- Being cut in half by Paul Daniels. Now that's magic!
- Being a female 007 and managing to go undercover to foil a plot of world domination by thousands of seagulls. I think this is because my car has been attacked by poop lately.
- Having sex at a party with Simon Cowell (yup, that's the nightmare). Lets just say it was good and I got through to Judges houses!
So, there you have it. I'm actually surprised I have time to dream all this seeing as I feel like I'm constantly awake with heartburn or toilet trips!
I'm hoping normal dream service will resume shortly.